TF2 one-shot--Es geht in Ordnung zu sein
by CaptainFleeper
Summary: Just a crappy one-shot I wrote in like an hour. Life's been getting me down lately and I wanted to take a breather and try to relax...it resulted in a lousy bit of fandulgence. Reader/Medic fluff. The title roughly mean "it will be all right in the end" in german or something.


"Aaagh!"

I slammed my fists into my pillow over and over, letting all the pent-up emotions within me wreak havoc upon the poor thing. Nothing but anger and sadness and resentment was within me, having built up over a matter of weeks, and if I didn't release it in this fashion then it was only going to get progressively worse.

"Stupid-stupid-stupid!" I seized the floppy, beaten cushion and hurled it against the wall. It hit the vinyl paneling with a hollow _whump_ and fell to the floor in a shapeless heap.

I took a deep breath, flopping down on the mattress and running my hands through my hair, gritting my teeth, eyes tight shut. Why couldn't life just be fair for once?

_Because life just isn't fair, girl, _a small voice in my head said._ Get used to it already._

I groaned and rolled over, staring at the letter on my bedside table. The stupid, stupid letter that ruined everything for me. The letter that told me, all too bluntly, I'd been fired.

I hadn't even thought it was possible to be fired from a team of dysfunctional mercenaries, but I guess where there's a will there's a way. And when that will belongs to the Administrator, that will quickly becomes law.

Getting fired for not being strong enough seemed like adding insult to injury anyway. The whole point of me coming here in the first place was to add a "feminine touch" (or as much of one as a tomboy like me could add) to the rough-and-tumble workplace of team BLU. But there it was, in black and white. I wasn't rugged enough for the job apparently, so they gave me the pink slip.

I curled up and wiped the resilient tears out of my eyes. I probably wouldn't have minded leaving this hellhole of a desert fortress if I hadn't fallen so hard for the team's medic. I'd kept it a secret, tried not to act like a fool when he caught me gazing at him during our leisure hours or right before a battle, tried to mask it all behind a smile and a dutiful "yes sir", but with every passing day it became harder and harder to control. And now I was leaving, leaving the next morning in fact, and I never got the chance to tell him how I really felt.

I finally broke down. I let it all loose.

I sobbed. I wailed. I retrieved my abused pillow and hugged it close, covering it with the tears of my unrequited love.

In short, I acted like a five year old, but I didn't care. Everything sucked, and that was that, and I was never going to get over this, and I had to leave tomorrow and everything was a mess.

Suddenly I heard loud knocking on my door. It was probably Miss Pauling, come to make sure I was ready to go at the crack of dawn.

"Ok, ok I know! Give me a second!" I said, voice cracking as I hastily stopped the waterworks and wiped my dripping nose on my sleeve.

The door creaked open a few inches and a bespectacled face peeked out from behind it.

"Hallo…?"

Oh dear sweet cornbread.

It was…him. Wearing his adorable shirt and vest, and that little curl on his forehead looking just perfect.

I sat bolt upright, fixing my mussed up and hair and blushing redder than an apple. I turned to him and said airily, pushing the sadness out of my voice as quickly as I could, "Oh! Hi. Sorry about the noise. I was just…uh…just…" I faltered under his concerned gaze.

Medic moved a bit more into the room, leaning against the doorframe. "You vere just…crying?"

I sighed. I nodded, feeling a fresh wave of sadness wash over me.

"You don't vant to leave zhe fortress, do you?" He asked quietly.

I shook my head quickly and whispered, "nope." I bit my lower lip, trying to hold back the bitter tears, but they came anyway, rebelliously sliding down my cheeks. Wow. No wonder I'm getting laid off. I can't even control my own emotions in a non-threatening situation like this. I hid my face in my arms.

He just stood there, silently watching me for a few minutes. I didn't dare meet his gaze; it would only make me feel worse. The only sounds were my muffled, choked sobs.

Finally he spoke.

"Vell, I vas coming in to tell you goodbye. I vasn't sure if I vould have zhe chance later in zhe evening, so…"

I looked up. He wore a strange expression, almost confused and sad at the same time.

"I suppose I should leave you alone, fräulein ." He stepped back, about to leave.

A surge of misery swept over me.

_No! Don't go yet! _The voice inside my head shouted, _I have something to tell you! _I sat up straight, thinking fast.

_Girl! Move it! Before it's too late!_

I dug around a minute, trying to pin down my voice, which had rather annoyingly decided to hide itself from me. Finally I found it.

"Mm..Medic?" I said shakily.

He looked back at me. "Ja?"

_Just say it! Just go right on ahead and say it!_

"I…need…to…" The words came out painfully slowly. I didn't think it was possible for one to sound so awkward and shy. "I want to…tell you…"

Medic raised an eyebrow, puzzled. "Vhat's wrong?"

"I'm…" I took a long, wobbly breath and closed my eyes. "I'm lonely. And scared."

It wasn't quite how I was feeling, but I couldn't bring myself to tell the whole unadulterated truth.

As I spoke fresh tears found their way out and I curled up again, my knees to my chin. "I'm sorry...I feel so…" My voice broke and more sobs pulsed through me.

"Aw, schatz…" I felt him sit down next to me and put a hand on my shaking shoulder. "Don't be ashamed. You haff every right to be upset."

I leaned into him a bit, feeling anguish inch its way into me. Here I was, in a situation that on any other occasion would have made me the happiest person in the world…but instead I felt like the sun would never shine again.

"Everyone goes through rough patches sometimes. It's a part of life. No one is ever guaranteed a trouble-free existence." He gently lifted my chin and looked into my eyes. "Don't let it break your heart."

I nodded, wiping the tears away.

"Listen, mein kamerad." He leaned in close, drawing me near to him. "You haff to be strong. I know it's hard, but you'll never be able to see past zhe bad and find zhe good if you don't even try."

"I just...I don't even know what I'm going to do after I leave. I'm not sure I'll be able to find a new job, a home, food...I can hardly remember life before Teufort, and I don't want to have to face life after it. It's so uncertain, I won't know what to do, I-"

"Be still." He said softly. "You're getting yourself all vorked up. It's not healthy." He moved around and knelt in front of me. "Stop crying."

I did, with some difficulty.

"Now take a deep breath."

I did.

"Close your eyes."

I did.

"Now I want you to relax."

I did.

And the next thing I felt was hands cupping my face, his forehead on mine.

"And now I vill heal you," he whispered.

It was a quick kiss, but that didn't make it any less electric. At first I was startled, unsure of exactly what was happening. But I quickly gave into it and melted into his embrace.

It most certainly did make me feel a lot better. I seemed to find my courage, telling myself that I would face whatever the future would bring with perseverance.

He gripped my hand in his and gave me a smile.

"Now normally zhe prescription is somezhing like 'take two pills and see me in zhe morning' but I zhink ve can skip zhe first part." He adjusted his glasses a bit.

I managed a weak smile. "Alright. Will do. Assuming the administrator and Miss Pauling aren't running me out of the building before dawn."

"Ah, I von't let zhem do zhat." He winked, stood up, and reached for the door.

"Medic," I said quietly.

"Yes, fräulein?"

"Thank you. I really needed that."

He grinned. "I thought you might." He opened the door and was about to walk away when he paused, and gave me a shy look. "And so did I."


End file.
